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Suddenly Single

 
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Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 5:40:50 PM   
nyst8ofmind


Posts: 46
Joined: 12/8/2006
Status: offline
Not sure if there's an age limit for posting here but I can no longer post in "Marriage".

I'm "suddenly" single @ 44 as a result of a divorce. Must admit that it's a bit unnerving to say the least. Not only have I not been single in over 20 years, but now I'm a Christian single. To say I feel overwhelmed is an understatement.

Any advice/suggestions/prayers from older singles on how to live a successful, Christian single life would be appreciated!
Post #: 1
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 5:43:27 PM   
Blazingson


Posts: 91
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline
There's no age limit here. Welcome to the "singles" forum.

_____________________________

*Eric G.*

Matthew 5:16
Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.
Post #: 2
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 6:28:07 PM   
ShallbeRebuilt


Posts: 2205
Joined: 11/8/2007
Status: online
Welcome, nyst8;

My heart goes out to you. I found myself "suddenly single" 9+ years ago, but by the death of my ddh. It's hard, but it's not impossible. We're here to help and support.

God bless you as you start your new life.

besiderself

_____________________________

SHALLBE’S BATTY BELFRY

Post #: 3
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 6:29:22 PM   
BlessedAngel1983


Posts: 11741
Joined: 6/8/2007
From: South Carolina
Status: offline
Welcome to the Singles Folder!

I've never been married, but my best advice is to let God take control.

_____________________________

Reflecting with Terri

If you're worried and you can't sleep
Just count your blessings instead of sheep
And you'll fall asleep counting your blessings

AKA AngelInWaiting1983
Post #: 4
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 8:36:38 PM   
mutinywxgirl


Posts: 12080
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: west coast of FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nyst8ofmind

Not sure if there's an age limit for posting here but I can no longer post in "Marriage".

I'm "suddenly" single @ 44 as a result of a divorce. Must admit that it's a bit unnerving to say the least. Not only have I not been single in over 20 years, but now I'm a Christian single. To say I feel overwhelmed is an understatement.

Any advice/suggestions/prayers from older singles on how to live a successful, Christian single life would be appreciated!


Oh, there is absolutely no age limit to posting in here! We have folks in their teens to one who is 60. We welcome one and all!

You will find a great group - with many varied backgrounds and experiences - who can help guide you through the feelings you are experiencing.

I've never been married, so I can't help much - other than pray (and to welcome you here!).

_____________________________

When blood and water hit the ground.
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down.
We were free and made alive.
The day true love died. The day true love died.


Lisa is happy THE ROWDIES ARE BACK!
Post #: 5
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 8:57:02 PM   
landabee


Posts: 2760
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Central Florida
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nyst8ofmind

Not sure if there's an age limit for posting here but I can no longer post in "Marriage".

I'm "suddenly" single @ 44 as a result of a divorce. Must admit that it's a bit unnerving to say the least. Not only have I not been single in over 20 years, but now I'm a Christian single. To say I feel overwhelmed is an understatement.

Any advice/suggestions/prayers from older singles on how to live a successful, Christian single life would be appreciated!



Welcome!

I am 42 and single since my divorce. I've been a single parent for the last 18 years.

I don't post much in this folder........but lurk quite a bit.

May God bless you and guide you in your new singleness.

_____________________________



"Sound theology discourages ignorance instead of promoting it." ~ CourdeLeon
Post #: 6
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 9:41:35 PM   
thedivabrat


Posts: 686
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: North and South
Status: online
Welcome to the forum--I'm the one who is 60 and single I guess. I have never been married so don't know about life as a suddenly single but since I have been single soooooooo long I do know it is what you make of it--

I think the transition will take some getting used to--be patient and wait on the Lord--He is faithful and loves you!!!

_____________________________

This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. Ps 118:24
Post #: 7
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 9:44:15 PM   
mutinywxgirl


Posts: 12080
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: west coast of FL
Status: offline
quote:

I'm the one who is 60 and single I guess.


Just wanted to let her know we had no age limits in here. You, divabrat, are very welcomed with your words of wisdom!

_____________________________

When blood and water hit the ground.
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down.
We were free and made alive.
The day true love died. The day true love died.


Lisa is happy THE ROWDIES ARE BACK!
Post #: 8
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 10:06:14 PM   
thedivabrat


Posts: 686
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: North and South
Status: online
Hey, I thought your comment was a hoot! No hurt feelings here I am what I am and glad to be here.

_____________________________

This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. Ps 118:24
Post #: 9
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/20/2008 10:32:15 PM   
John_O

 

Posts: 8015
Joined: 9/5/2006
Status: online
Welcome Billy Joel Song!

It's quite a shock to be single again after so long isn't it? I was in the same shape (but via widowerhood). 20 years since I last was single. Now a Christian then a sinner. The world had chnaged in one direction and I had changed in the opposite direction.

But you know what? God hasn't changed and He's still in control. Give yourself time to grieve your marriage and surround yourself with good people (like here). Then when you decide what you want to do with the rest of your life, do it.

_____________________________

Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
Post #: 10
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/21/2008 12:15:05 AM   
tlims

 

Posts: 435
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline
Hey nyst8ofmind,

It's not so easy to start over, especially after so many years, is it? I've been there too -- actually sometimes still trying to get there! But the Lord is good. He directs when you don't expect it, He encourages when you need it most and as always, He is faithful thru everything.

I think you'll find a lot of encouragement & fun here... some of the people are quite goofy, but we'll forgive them for that, eh?

I'm really glad you're here.
Post #: 11
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/21/2008 12:16:12 AM   
okrox

 

Posts: 157
Joined: 4/28/2005
Status: offline
Welcome. Come on in.

I'm 43, three kids at home, divorced 5 years after 17 years of marriage.

I think it's really helpful to remember that it's ok to be sad and grieve for as long as you need, but at the same time hold on to the belief that you will feel better.

You will.

I promise.

Read lots of Psalms and come back here often.

Hugs,
Roxie

_____________________________

Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be 'til I die.
Post #: 12
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/21/2008 12:24:58 AM   
shemaromans

 

Posts: 3752
Joined: 3/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

Any advice/suggestions/prayers from older singles on how to live a successful, Christian single life would be appreciated!

Welcome!

A successful, Christian single life? There's lots of ways. Be yourself. Get involved with activities that interest you. Try your best to enjoy each day to the fullest, even when you really don't want to--you know, rejoice in the Lord always.

And spend some time here. There are a ton of characters around these parts that will make you smile and laugh when you really need to. Also, many, many posters here encourage and pray for one another. It's a special place.

Hope that helps!

_____________________________

"But as for me, it is good to be near God." Psalm 73:28
Post #: 13
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/21/2008 7:30:08 AM   
.Pammy


Posts: 3888
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: PA, USA
Status: offline
nyst8ofmind - well, it certainly looks like you've come to the right place, doesn't it?

Hop in and join the fun!


_____________________________

Pam


<< Toby

"Sweet-talkers win at singles' bars and in politics ... often with similar outcomes for the listener."
Post #: 14
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/21/2008 6:37:30 PM   
deanna48


Posts: 15
Joined: 7/5/2008
Status: offline
You can do it: one day at a time. Be kind and patient with yourself. I was suddenly single 18 years ago (at the age of 30) when my husband suddenly died after being married for 12 years. My kids were 2, 7 & 10. I never thought I would be single for this long and most people aren't single this long - I had alot of healing to go thru; However, you can do it with the Lord's guidance and love. He makes a way out of no way and He will never leave you nor forsake you. He's the one person who will always be there.
Post #: 15
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/26/2008 6:18:46 PM   
jika

 

Posts: 6
Joined: 7/12/2008
Status: offline
Hi nyst 8 of mind,
I have never been married, even if I had I would never know what you are going through but I sure can say that my heart goes out to you, because we are of the same body. For when one part of our physical body is in pain, say the eye the ear does not say uhah mr eye, I told you not to....Well, Romans 8 comes to mind please read through the entire chaphter and you will be in my prayer, that is the best I can do.
And remember, every one of us can disappoint you, but thnaks be to God that we know Jesus who has and WILL never disappoint, and finally He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber'
Post #: 16
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/26/2008 10:28:28 PM   
CoeurdeLeon_


Posts: 9306
Joined: 9/4/2005
From: Inside my head
Status: offline
Welcome. You've come to the right place.


I'm 42, 2 kids at home, divorced for 4 yrs after 21 years of marriage. It takes time to get over the shock and to feel all the successive things you need to feel on the way to healing. But it does get better. God brought you this far, He'll see you the rest of the way.

_____________________________

This morning I was awakened by the sound of purple
colliding with the fragrance of laughter.
Eutychus







New Blog
Post #: 17
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/28/2008 10:51:36 AM   
hotsaucygma


Posts: 3106
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
NY8, just wanted to add my "welcome". I'm 54, "suddenly single" for almost 6 years now. It isn't always an easy journey, but it is a good one, has been for me at least. Oh the things I've learned in the last 6 years...!! I am much stronger now, have learned I am much more capable than I ever thought and also learned some limitations . But all in all it has been good.

Hang out, have fun - these are very nice people (well most of 'em anyway ) LOL!

_____________________________

Dear Lord, let my words today be as sweet and delicious as cheesecake... for tomorrow I may have to eat them!
Post #: 18
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/28/2008 11:11:02 AM   
offtheisland


Posts: 479
Joined: 7/17/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline
HI! I am in my late 40's, single three years after 23 years of marriage. Four kids; two at home still (one almost out the door.) Have you heard of DivorceCare? It helped me.

_____________________________

My heart is steadfast, O God; I will sing and make music with all my soul.
Psalm 108:1
Post #: 19
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/28/2008 11:15:13 AM   
landabee


Posts: 2760
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Central Florida
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: offtheisland

HI! I am in my late 40's, single three years after 23 years of marriage. Four kids; two at home still (one almost out the door.) Have you heard of DivorceCare? It helped me.


DivorceCare helped me as well. But I will caution, the experience is only as good as the group of confidantes that join you are willing to be involved and transparent.

I was blessed by the experience, however I know a few folks that didn't feel comfortable enough to open up... and therefore were not nearily as helped.

BTW: Nice to meet all of my contemporaries! We are truly a low participating bloc in this folder for sure!

We need to change that.

_____________________________



"Sound theology discourages ignorance instead of promoting it." ~ CourdeLeon
Post #: 20
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/28/2008 11:25:14 AM   
hotsaucygma


Posts: 3106
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
I thought DivorceCare was wonderful too... I'm sure many here have heard me suggest it often, so often I worry that people are tired of hearing it ...

I'm sorry to hear some folks haven't had good experiences with it - it was a life saver for me! And I have several friends that came out of that group from 5 + years ago!!

_____________________________

Dear Lord, let my words today be as sweet and delicious as cheesecake... for tomorrow I may have to eat them!
Post #: 21
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/28/2008 11:31:05 AM   
landabee


Posts: 2760
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Central Florida
Status: offline
quote:

I'm sorry to hear some folks haven't had good experiences with it - it was a life saver for me! And I have several friends that came out of that group from 5 + years ago!!


Although I'd been separated/divorced almost 7 years... DivorceCare jumpstarted the healing process for me.

I recommended that one of my friends that had a less than positive experience to sign up through another church group. He had a much better experience there. People were much more open and shared.

_____________________________



"Sound theology discourages ignorance instead of promoting it." ~ CourdeLeon
Post #: 22
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/28/2008 11:50:56 AM   
hotsaucygma


Posts: 3106
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
Glad you suggested he try DC again, landabee. The couple that led our group isn't doing them any more, it's too bad too. They were great leaders!

_____________________________

Dear Lord, let my words today be as sweet and delicious as cheesecake... for tomorrow I may have to eat them!
Post #: 23
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/28/2008 12:06:23 PM   
iwillfearnoevil


Posts: 4461
Joined: 11/6/2007
From: upstate NY
Status: online
divorcecare daily email devotions:
http://divorcecare.com/dailyemails/

free, one email takes a few minutes to read, they never spam you, it's awesome!
it's an ordered set of 365 and they mail you one a day. even if it's been awhile since someone was divorced, they are still good to look through, and you can always easily unsubscribe if you don't find them relevant.

you can still post in marriage if you want btw.

_____________________________

Photoblogging My Life
Post #: 24
RE: Suddenly Single - 7/28/2008 2:44:30 PM   
hotsaucygma


Posts: 3106
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: iwillfearnoevil

you can still post in marriage if you want btw.

True! I often do... sometimes I hope someone could learn from my mistakes, sometimes I hope I'm learning from them!

_____________________________

Dear Lord, let my words today be as sweet and delicious as cheesecake... for tomorrow I may have to eat them!
Post #: 25
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