The things you never dreamed you'd say... (Full Version)

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MamaPyratekk -> The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/8/2008 9:48:04 AM)

I was reading over the "Kids Say The Cutest Things" post and it reminded me of a post I saw on another forum...

What are some things you've said to your child that you just never would have dreamed would have ever come out of your mouth? For instance, two of them for me are:

"Jacob, you smell like poop but mommy loves you anyways" and
"Okay let's not put the block on our penis today!" (excuse the wording, we just chose to use the technical names for all the parts lol)




MamaMilty -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/8/2008 3:22:36 PM)

2 boys in the back of the shopping cart....

"Don't sit on the bread, please."...."Soup in not a weapon." And the one that got snickers from the crowd, "Sit down and keep your tongues in your own mouths." [8|]




Jenny-Fair -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/8/2008 7:04:50 PM)

quote:

we just chose to use the technical names for all the parts

We do, too. My motto with my boys is, 'if you have one, you had better be able to name it!' LOL And no...never planned on saying that!




Sunnymom -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/8/2008 7:15:21 PM)

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!"[8D]




4IMPersuaded -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/8/2008 7:37:47 PM)

On a vacation, as we pulled away from the roadside fruitstand, "We don't put our feet in the mango bag."

My sister shared with me last week that she said to her daughter while visiting our brother. "Please don't lick the front door!"




jennleigh -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/12/2008 8:42:29 AM)

"Just because it smells good doesn't mean you should eat it"

Had to say that (more than once, actually) to my middle son who loves to "taste" anything that he thinks smells good, including soap, lotion, and shampoo!




mommyplus3 -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/12/2008 9:12:02 AM)

LOL...these are so cute!!

Along the same lines, my mother remembers (though throughout the mommy years, I seem to have forgotten) me telling my daughtr when she was 2, "We may touch the wall, but not lick it."

More recently, as hubby and I were driving down the road with the 3, I said to the 9 yo boy, "Please take the plastic bag off of your sister's head!" We cracked up as it came out of my mouth.

And my fave....as the kids were getting a little rowdy one night, "If I have to come down there...I'm goona ???." Nope, had nothing to add...it just seemed like the thing to say ...came out of my mouth before I knew what was happening ;o)




Focusing -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/12/2008 7:11:30 PM)

"Because I said so, that's why!"

The first time those words popped out of my mouth, I thought [sm=icon_smile_yikes.gif] "I can't believe I just said THAT!!!"


Now I use that phrase on a regular basis. Hey, he's almost a teenager ... [sm=Llol.gif][sm=Llol.gif][sm=Llol.gif][sm=Llol.gif][sm=Llol.gif]




jennleigh -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/12/2008 7:51:54 PM)

Just tonight, while my husband was bouncing our fussy, constipated newborn on his knee:

"Can we have some poopy please?"

Never thought I'd hear someone ASK for it before LOL!!!




Roberta_ -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/12/2008 8:30:49 PM)

One day I had nine kids with me (my own and some that I was babysitting.) It had been a long day and we had to walk to town (about 2 blocks) to buy groceries for me to feed them all supper. By the time we were checking out I begged the cashier to "please call the cops because I'm a kidnapper and I've decided to repent of my ways!"

I'm not sure if it was a good or bad thing that the cashier knew me and knew that I was kidding! [;)]




Covaan_Meshuga -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/12/2008 11:30:38 PM)

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! You guys are FUNNY!!!

Well, the other day, my daughter was cutting up, teasing me, so I told her, "You'd better watch out! I'll put you back where I got you!" You should have seen her 18.5-year-old's eyes pop! [:D]

When I was little, I don't know who all said it in my childhood family, but there was a lot of saying negative or accusatory stuff, backed up with the words, "And it's all your fault!" Well, I knew I would never say that to my children, until the first time I really did say it. I had been telling one of them, "I really love you!" then without thinking, I followed that up with "And it's all your fault!" We giggled at that, so I kept on saying it. My grandchildren have heard it many, many times now.




Roberta_ -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/12/2008 11:41:51 PM)

"I love you and it's all your fault!" That's cute!!

Do you mind if I text that to my dd?




Covaan_Meshuga -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/12/2008 11:58:32 PM)

Hee-hee-hee! Go for it!! [:D]




zoebob -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/13/2008 8:30:50 AM)

I just told 2 of mine that and they looked at my like I was crazy




OneOfHisJewels -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/14/2008 2:16:23 AM)

I used to get SO frustrated as a kid when my dad mixed up our names (my sisters' and mine), then when my nephew was little, and our beloved dog Talitha was still around, I called the dog by my nephew's name[sm=blush.gif]. Thankfully, I never called my nephew the dog's name.




Roberta_ -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/14/2008 2:21:59 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OneOfHisJewels

I used to get SO frustrated as a kid when my dad mixed up our names (my sisters' and mine), then when my nephew was little, and our beloved dog Talitha was still around, I called the dog by my nephew's name[sm=blush.gif]. Thankfully, I never called my nephew the dog's name.


I did, so did my parents, so do my siblings. The dog, the cat, the hamster, the goldfish then the kids. [;)]
We'll get to the right name eventually![:D]




PatricksPeaches -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/16/2008 10:41:50 PM)

Today as I was sitting on our couch checking email after church my daughter was laying beside me and I had to say something to her and you will see why when I say it..."Please get your toes off my computer" HA HA She was pointing at something with her fat little toes. Too funny!!




Tinkerbell_ -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/17/2008 9:42:46 AM)

Let's see...

"Quit biting the dog!"

"Did you just lick that????"

"Quit giving your brother wedgies!" "I'm not! I'm giving myself a wedgie!" "Then quit giving yourself wedgies! You're scaring your brother!"

"Sweetie...those are for women only...they aren't cushions to put in your shoes." (when Thing 2 had feminine napkins stuffed in his shoes)




Jenny-Fair -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/17/2008 9:43:51 AM)

Stop mooing and do your math.




isaacsmom -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/17/2008 11:35:50 PM)

"Get that out of your mouth! It's goat poo, not a Raisinette!"




Mrs.Wifey -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/17/2008 11:48:00 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sunnymom

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!"[8D]


Oh, my dad used to say "I brought you into this world, I can take you out AND make 6 more just like you!"




OneOfHisJewels -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/18/2008 4:27:49 AM)

quote:


"Sweetie...those are for women only...they aren't cushions to put in your shoes." (when Thing 2 had feminine napkins stuffed in his shoes)



That reminds me of an American's Funniest Home Videos I saw, where 2 boys (brothers, I believe) had stuck a bunch of feminine napkins all over the wall. The mom asked them what they were doing, and they said, "Oh, we're playing with these airplane stickers." I bet she never thought she would say, "Those are NOT airplane stickers," about those items.

Tink, I had a childhood friend whose brother also thought that those items were sneaker cushions, but the mom didn't know it until he got tired of them and took them out of his shoes. Guess where and when he took them out? In church, right during Sunday AM service. [:o] I'm sure his mom never thought she would have to say, "Don't display sanitary napkins in church"

I also read once about a little girl who was told to go set the table, and she was just learning to read, and her mom told her to put napkins on the table..well you can imagine how it went from there..and to top it off they had guests that night. I'm sure her mom never thought she would have to say, "Don't use the napkins from the bathroom for setting the table."




Roberta_ -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/18/2008 11:37:50 AM)

OOHJ- I've always loved that story about the little girl. Everytime it comes around in e-mail it makes me smile. Thank you for giving me my first smile of the day!




karlie -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/18/2008 1:31:35 PM)

No, I don't want to see a cherry loogie

Popsicles aren't bath toys

Take the straw out of your oatmeal, please

No, you do not have prostate problems...you're a girl.

You're going to catch your socks on fire (this, just last night to my 20 year old. Oy.)




Brandy -> RE: The things you never dreamed you'd say... (7/18/2008 2:52:41 PM)

To my 3 wk old daughter yesterday..

"Please stop spitting up, I'm running out of shirt sleeve"

To my husband the other night:

"She's pooing on my hand!! Make her stop!!"

Him the other night:

"Just give her a minute and she will be done, it's just poo"




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