|
Yetto1997 -> RE: Does anyone feel like their husband/wife is not the one that God meant for you? (7/10/2008 1:32:04 PM)
|
quote:
I think questioning whether or not we married "the right one" or "the one God made for us" is a very dangerous slope that leads to further discontentment and pain for everyone. As long as you are going there in your mind, you will never be content in your marriage. The truth is, once we commit to someone and enter into marriage with them, they are the right one, even if it wasn't the original intention of God or the one we should have chosen. It's now a covenant and it's time stop questioning what could have or should have been, and to look at what we can do to breathe life into that marriage and become the spouse we should be.
I think looking at this from your husband's point of view may help you see things a little more clearly. It's very likely he is feeling the same exact way as you...it's rare that one spouse is discontent while the other is just completely satisfied and thrilled with the marriage. He is probably feeling as lonely and isolated as you are in the marriage, and maybe even questioning himself if he made the right decision. The only way that will change is for one of you to reach out to the other and decide to create change and closeness in the marriage.
In the end, no matter who we are married to, being a good wife(or husband) comes down to doing it for God and not always for the person we are married to. Being the spouse God wants us to be means giving our will over to God. If we can't do the right thing for love of our spouse, then we should be able to begin by looking at it as an act of obedience to God. Often, behaving our way into real change, even when we don't feel it, creates a change of heart and a change in our emotions. Sometimes, it's the act of obedience and just doing what's right that releases the flow of blessings back into that area of our lives.
Amen! I agree that it is hard to truly access a situation and offer advice through a post, although I think that Karlie did a great job. There are times when we pray to God and ask for understanding, patience, or help in general to become the person that we want to be. What we must keep in mind is keeping our hearts open to the opportunities in our lives that allow us to be that person. God wants to provide for us, but we need to be willing to submit. "In everything give thanks, for this is Gods will for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thessalonians 5 18) When we rely on our own understanding, we tend to justify our actions. It's easy to get caught up in a whirlwind of emotion and hurt when we're arguing with our spouses, and it's easier to fall back into old behaviors of dealing with that pain. Isn't that just what the devil wants us to do when he's whispering in our ears? What we need to remember is that God may be using our spouses to teach us about something inside our hearts, and He may be giving us an opportunity to change our ways and choose His path. When we're not fully in tune to His voice, it's sometimes difficult to see the chances that He offers to become the person we so desperately pray to be. We become one flesh with our spouses, and we rely on them to make us stronger. If I feel that I am impatient, I am grateful to God for giving me a husband who teaches me ways to attain patience (regardless of how frustrating that may seem! [;)]) Remember to show yourself as an example in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity, and in His own proper time, God will bless you. I keep you in my prayers.
|
|
|
|