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RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry

 
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RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 7/31/2008 7:00:48 PM   
ShallbeRebuilt


Posts: 2205
Joined: 11/8/2007
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Thanks, Shema;

I appreciated your thoughts; they were confirmation of what God had been speaking.

But today I am not only BATTY but BUMMED. hmmm...kinda seems like I only come here to the belfry to whine....meh. Well, that's the cool thing about PFY's...nobody is forced to read them!

I am bummed because I had lunch with my mom today. Normally, that's a thing to post in the "Things I can thank God for today" thread. But today as I was trying to explain to her my new approach toward life and especially school ("it's a marathon, not a sprint"), she started explaining to me that my kids would soon be grown and gone (which I very well know), that I'm not getting any younger (that I also know) and that I would need something to do to keep busy so that I wouldn't think about companionship...

Then she added "if that's what you want".

Huh?

I interpreted that to mean "if you want to stay single". Heck! I thought I'd made that abundantly clear to her! I don't want to stay single! Only if that is the best plan the Lord has for me...and since I don't know that, can't know that for sure...

So I went on to explain to her that no, I don't want to remain single, that in fact when I've finished school we will not likely stay at our current church (where my parents go, also), but will maybe start going to a church in nearby Austin where I might have more chance of finding a potential mate.

After which she gave me the lecture about how God can BRING the guy to me...

I KNOW that. But I can't keep sitting on my laurels! Not because I don't believe God can bring the fellow wherever I am, but because I feel like I have to be doing something about it. Making some kind of effort keeps me from feeling so totally hopeless.

Anyway...it was such a confusing conversation...she seemed to totally miss the point I was making about school, which was not that I was going to quit or even really slow down in getting my degree, but just not panic so much or try to do it faster and to try to be more available to my family.

Maybe I misinterpreted her comment about "if that's what you want". Maybe she's afraid I don't want the degree enough because of my comments about school, who knows?

I don't know. Now my brain is asking "what's WRONG with wanting to be married? What's WRONG with taking a different, more sane approach to school? So WHAT if I'm 50 instead of 49 when I get my degree? Why CAN'T I make time in my life for seeking a mate?"

Ok. Deeeeeppp breath. Wipe eyes, blow nose. What do I know for sure?

I know God loves me.

I know HE will provide for me...yes, I have to do the best I can making wise decisions, but HE is responsible for provide for me to be able to do the things He's called me to do.

I know HE has led me to this attitude about school. I know He wants me to finish my degree.

The rest is up to Him and is so far in the future at this point that no matter what my mother says, I don't have to make concrete decisions about it now.

So. Steadying breath. I know what the course is. Even though I love my mother and many times in my life she has spoken truth and wise counsel to me, this time she may not have heard God, and as long as I know what He's saying to ME, I can be ok with that.

Right?

besiderself

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RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 7/31/2008 8:21:30 PM   
sunluvingirl


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Right, Esther

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Post #: 277
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 7/31/2008 9:10:23 PM   
kj88il


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From: IL (NW Central)
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esther...my first thought when reading that was that it seems like one of those situations when satan intentionally put a little 'miscommunication' in between you and your mom...JUST to mess wth your head....to try to get you off track.

but you are HOLDING STEADY IN YOUR FAITH, gal...and that so rocks!!!!!!!!

(and i'm still praying)

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Post #: 278
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/1/2008 11:33:22 AM   
JustJeannie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kj88il

esther...my first thought when reading that was that it seems like one of those situations when satan intentionally put a little 'miscommunication' in between you and your mom...JUST to mess wth your head....to try to get you off track.

but you are HOLDING STEADY IN YOUR FAITH, gal...and that so rocks!!!!!!!!

(and i'm still praying)


That's kinda what I was thinking. A pastor once said "Satan has a way of twisting words in the time it takes from leaving your lips to reaching their ears."........does that make sense to anyone else????

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'Cause I'm cool like that....
Post #: 279
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/1/2008 12:24:27 PM   
ShallbeRebuilt


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Joined: 11/8/2007
Status: online
Thanks, girls;

I got it, Jeannie.

I'm even more bummed today...need to revamp the budget. Always a scary project. But now I'm determined to quit whining about it, and looking for help in all the wrong places (nobody understands my financial situation, so nobody can give me proper advice. I know the principles, I know what God has called me to do) and just get the job done.

I will not complete it in the next couple days. It is not the time of month I should be facing emotionally charged financial adjustments. I'll just jot down stuff that needs to be considered for a few days until I am more emotionally stable.

It's nice to have friends!!!

besiderself
P.S. This old computer is having issues with posting today, so if you don't hear from me, don't panic.

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SHALLBE’S BATTY BELFRY

Post #: 280
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 12:24:58 AM   
humbleinspirit


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Hi Esther, I will keep you in prayer!

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RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 7:35:10 AM   
ShallbeRebuilt


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Thanks Mike.

My son is home for the weekend, so my spirits have been raised a little by that!

besiderself

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SHALLBE’S BATTY BELFRY

Post #: 282
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 7:37:08 AM   
sunluvingirl


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Enjoy your weekend, Esther

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Post #: 283
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 7:37:10 AM   
humbleinspirit


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Thats good Esther! Enjoy your time with him!

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Post #: 284
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 8:16:11 AM   
ShallbeRebuilt


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Since I have only been coming here to whine and not to encourage, I thought I should try to pull up a little positive craziness for you Batty Peeps.

I spoke with GP1 yesterday, and we discussed the hunch that The Question will soon be asked. Ever since Chris Rice's album Amusing came out I have wanted to send The Beau this song, but of course, that would have seemed pushy at the worst and impolitic at the least.

But the two of them never venture over to CW unless I specifically point something out for them to look at, so it's safe for me to crow a bit and give you the

Chanson du jour

I'll be sure to post when the real thing happens...please y'all keep praying for them...

besiderself

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SHALLBE’S BATTY BELFRY

Post #: 285
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 8:21:55 AM   
humbleinspirit


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Nice song Esther, thanks for sharing!

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Post #: 286
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 8:28:48 AM   
.Pammy


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quote:

that would have seemed pushy

Ummm, yeah, I think that assessment would be correct.

Love the song though!


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Pam


<< Toby

"Sweet-talkers win at singles' bars and in politics ... often with similar outcomes for the listener."
Post #: 287
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 8:40:20 AM   
mvic


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Just visiting ...

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Post #: 288
RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 8:44:32 AM   
humbleinspirit


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Welcome Mvic!

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RE: Besiderself's Batty Belfry - 8/2/2008 2:54:02 PM   
BlessedAngel1983


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Great song Esther!

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internet down - 8/2/2008 10:01:05 PM   
ShallbeRebuilt


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Glad the song blessed you.

My internet has been down since early morning!

Besiderself

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SHALLBE’S BATTY BELFRY

Post #: 291
RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:09:55 PM   
WaitingforBoaz


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Hi Esther!!!

Just thought I'd stop by and say hello. I have not had much time to be online lately. Been on a little today though, just catching up, if that is even possible.
I hope you are doing well!!!

~Blessings~

Nadine

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Post #: 292
RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:38:35 PM   
ShallbeRebuilt


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Hey Nadine!

Glad to hear from you. We were planning a search and rescue mission, but then you showed up.

Happy to hear that your life is busy in a good way.

Keep in touch!

besiderself

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SHALLBE’S BATTY BELFRY

Post #: 293
RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:44:12 PM   
humbleinspirit


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Hi Esther, how are you this evening?

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Post #: 294
RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:46:32 PM   
ShallbeRebuilt


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Hey Mike;

I'm hanging out tonight with a really, really cool, awesome, handsome, intelligent and high quality man...


my son.

besiderself

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SHALLBE’S BATTY BELFRY

Post #: 295
RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:47:35 PM   
humbleinspirit


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Very nice Esther! I am hanging out with me, myself and I

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RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:48:15 PM   
FunBetty


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quote:

ORIGINAL: besiderself

Hey Mike;

I'm hanging out tonight with a really, really cool, awesome, handsome, intelligent and high quality man...


my son.

besiderself


Care to elaborate???? Does he have any single friends for Jeannie??

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Post #: 297
RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:48:57 PM   
humbleinspirit


Posts: 17768
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Hiya FB, hows the Metroplex?

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Post #: 298
RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:52:12 PM   
FunBetty


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100+ degrees, Mike.

I need snow, STAT.



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RE: internet down - 8/2/2008 10:53:42 PM   
humbleinspirit


Posts: 17768
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From: Just Outside of Boston
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You want snow?

throws a snowball at FB!

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