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RE: opposite sex friends in your room? - 6/19/2008 9:51:08 PM
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stevtomato
Posts: 4
Joined: 6/19/2008
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Hmm, I've got a question.
Last week, a friend of mine (a girl) came and I showed her the music I composed (I'm a student composer). And it was blasting loud in my room, so I closed the door.
Well, my shepherd (we have this sheperding system where a leader is assigned to you and will take care of you and your walk with God, which is great imo) told me that despite the fact that he trusts me that I won't be tempted etc., my actions will cause others to stumble. For example a housemate of mine, who is a year or two younger than I am.
So, it's basically saying that I shouldn't do that.
What do you guys think?
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RE: opposite sex friends in your room? - 6/20/2008 10:32:20 AM
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fluffmonkey
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From: some where over the rainbow
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What he is saying that you are setting an example for the others around you, and while he knows you may have just been showing her your music....but that it gives the idea its okay to have girls in your room with door closed.
I guess its okay to have girls in your room but door must be open? is that your policy?
if you shut the door because the music was loud (why didnt you turn it down instead or next time turn it down instead.)
we are watched by others all the time thats why our action speak louder then words.
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RE: opposite sex friends in your room? - 6/21/2008 10:47:43 AM
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stevtomato
Posts: 4
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I didn't turn it down coz it's classical music and some parts are loud while some others are soft, the effects are achieved only when you hear the music as what the dynamics should be.
I guess this is the some of the really few disadvantages of living with Christians. I mean I didn't used to live with a Christian family and being in a room talking with a girl is a normal thing.
Sometimes I wonder so much. Even hugging a girl is a no no with the people in this church. Quite different from the church I was from. Most likely coz most of them here are Asians and the Asian culture of opposite sex is less intimatel
Oh well, just need to get used to it.
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RE: opposite sex friends in your room? - 6/29/2008 4:21:15 AM
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beachcooky
Posts: 893
Joined: 6/21/2008
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Woot, I'm 19 going to a community college and a freshman too! Awesome! Except in August I'm going to be a sophomore.
While I was growing up, my parents wouldn't let me have a guy in my room as well.
But since you are living alone, well kinda, you have to make your own rules. If you are a Christian, pray to God and seek HIS advice.
I honestly don't know what I'll do when I start living at dorms. I still live at my house haha. Cos I'm a loser? Haha, jk.
Well, I hope I offered you SOME advice.
You are an adult now and it's your choice to what you want to do.
Your parent really don't have a say in it. I mean, they can give you advice. But the decision is ultimately up to you :)
Take care girly!
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RE: opposite sex friends in your room? - 7/27/2008 12:22:51 AM
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FadedGlory
Posts: 69
Joined: 5/11/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: crimsonfollower
Personally- I would never have a guy in my bedroom for more than about 2 secs - period. And if/when they do come in- for even just a couple of minutes, the door is always open. If you want to spend time "alone" with a guy, there are plenty of other places to do so beside the bedroom - the corner of a living room, or outside on the porch - in other words place where you can talk but you are still where other people can see you. Those places are more open and a lot less temptation would be there than in the bedroom. I am not trying to give anybody a guilt trip, but just stating my own convictions on the matter. Just so you know, I am 25 and currently do not live at home. However, even if I did live at home, the same rules would still apply- both because they are my own thoughts and because they are my parents' thoughts on the matter.
Absolutely!!
Here is my opinion. I don't have any guy friends but if I did we probably wouldn't NEED to hang out in my room. The only reason I'd bring a guy into my room was if I wanted to show him something, for instance, I have a lot of paintings hanging in my room that I painted myself and would like to show them to friends. But I agree with crimson, the door should always be open. There's no real reason to hang out in a room with a guy and you should avoid the appearance of evil. Staying in plain sight is always good and if it's a boyfriend you're talking about, like crimson also said, there are places you can go that have some privacy but also aren't confined and completely isolated, like the porch of the corner of the living room or maybe another room next to a room full of people.
And remember, don't ever do anything that your conscience is uneasy about.
PS my parents won't let any guys in my room, it's all for the best I suppose. I don't see any harm in it
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"Have I therefore become your enemy because I tell you the truth?" Galatians 4:18
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