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Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 9:59:25 AM
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dianetavegia
Posts: 2032
Joined: 8/23/2005
From: Southern Baptist, Non Calvinist, Pro Life Ga. girl
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What is the most negative thing you've had said to you or about your children, family, regarding your decision to home school?
What is the most positive thing said to you or your family about your decision to home school, your children, or family?
I know I've heard the 'socialization' remark 100 times in the last 10 years but wondered what you've heard.
How do you respond?
A positive I heard:
'We never have trouble with home schooled kids. They are always so well behaved. ' Said by a 'guide' to our home school group during a field trip.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 10:15:39 AM
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Bagel
Posts: 319
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Oregon
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I was at the library a few weeks ago and another mother there saw my kids checking out the large globe on their own and talking about the countries and states etc. and she looked at me, smiled and said, "You homeschool don't you".
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Bagel Lisa
check out my blog at http://bagelslifehomeschool.blogspot.com/
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 11:07:16 AM
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Sunnymom
Posts: 1829
Joined: 4/11/2005
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The worst thing that happened was back when we first started home educating, I was getting my hair done and had my son with me. The stylist asked why my son was out of school, and I told her we homeschooled. She got red in the face and proceeded to lecture me harshly on how stupid my son would be, who did I think I was to attempt to do what others studied for years to be able to do, that I couldn't hide him away from the world forever.... and he was sitting right there listening to her. I never argue with anyone holding scissors, so I waited until she was done with my hair before I responded. Then I asked for the manager and told her what happened, and that I'd never be back in a place of business where customers were treated with such disrespect. There were some other customers visibly upset, and I am almost sure that one lady walked out on her appointment. Then there was a lady who followed through a grocery store parking lot yelling at me and my son for shopping during school hours... I must be a 'crazy magnet'.
On the positive side, I hear many comments about how happy and friendly and easy-going my kids are, how interested they seem to be in everything, and that they ask good questions. Overall I hear folks say that homeschooled kids tend to be more self-motivated, able to keep to a schedule and accomplish work on their own, and are generally more polite.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 11:46:31 AM
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dianetavegia
Posts: 2032
Joined: 8/23/2005
From: Southern Baptist, Non Calvinist, Pro Life Ga. girl
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It always amazes me that people assume our children won't be able to get a job, hold down a job, succeed in life, etc. By time a lot of our kids are in the workforce, I believe many, if not most jobs will be 'work from home'. That puts OUR kids way ahead!
My son overheard someone say he'd be homeless and never get a job if he was homeschooled through high school.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 11:57:57 AM
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misaham
Posts: 757
Joined: 10/27/2007
From: Just west of Cleveland, OH
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quote:
My son overheard someone say he'd be homeless and never get a job if he was homeschooled through high school.
I read that to my daughter, and she laughed with this, "that sounds like a challenge to me!" in her voice! ha ha
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<<-------- My Adorable Kiddos!!
My new blog... http://misa-laneous.blogspot.com/
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 12:05:47 PM
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Sunnymom
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quote:
ORIGINAL: dianetavegia
It always amazes me that people assume our children won't be able to get a job, hold down a job, succeed in life, etc. By time a lot of our kids are in the workforce, I believe many, if not most jobs will be 'work from home'. That puts OUR kids way ahead!
My son overheard someone say he'd be homeless and never get a job if he was homeschooled through high school.
And it never occurs to folks that the homeless population, not to mention that of jails, mental hospitals, lines at the unemployment office and job&family services, is made up of folks who went to public schools?
I don't mind if someone has questions about home education, but they sure do show their bias and ignorance when they make such asinine statements.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 12:14:14 PM
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crankius
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Sunnymom,
I just love reading your posts. I've missed seeing you around Crosswalk.
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Do not be overly righteous, Nor be overly wise: Why should you destroy yourself?
Ecclesiastes 7:16
SYSTEMATIC THEOLOGY
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 12:15:37 PM
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cynthia
Posts: 8078
Joined: 3/31/2005
From: Beautiful Puget Sound Region
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Our family was once heckled by a homeless person when we came out of a field trip in San Diego. She was sitting on the dock by an aircraft carrier we had just come off and asked the kids why they weren't in school. TL said, "we're homeschooled." The woman started shouting about how they (the children) didn't have to put up with that and, "You have a right to a public education." We kept on going and kept shouting as we were walking away. That was one of the strangest experiences I've ever had.
People frequently compliment us on our children. They say our children are polite and a pleasure to have around. We were at the store one day and MM and Mr. Manly were hugging each other. MM had been at camp for a week and Mr. Manly had missed her a lot. The man at the counter said it was very nice to see brother and sister who love each other.
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My husband and I have a motto:
We are the leader. We are one.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 12:26:47 PM
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Bagel
Posts: 319
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From: Oregon
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quote:
The man at the counter said it was very nice to see brother and sister who love each other
That is so sweet!
I think that the most outright negative statement I've heard in the time that I've been homeschooling was about 5 or 6 years ago. We went to my dad's for Thanksgiving and as soon as we walked in the door, my sister's aunt takes my little girl aside and asks in the most pitiful tone, "Honey, do you get to see other children?".
Let's just say, that I wasn't feeling so loving toward the aunt at that moment.
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Bagel Lisa
check out my blog at http://bagelslifehomeschool.blogspot.com/
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 12:44:54 PM
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misaham
Posts: 757
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From: Just west of Cleveland, OH
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quote:
Let's just say, that I wasn't feeling so loving toward the aunt at that moment.
It would have been funny if she had said, "there are other children?"! LOL
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<<-------- My Adorable Kiddos!!
My new blog... http://misa-laneous.blogspot.com/
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 12:57:07 PM
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shadowspring
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That so reminds me of the Pink Floyd lyric:
"mama's gonna put all of her fears into you" from The Wall.
It's bad enough that people do it to their own children (I have had to fight the tendency many times!) but why, oh why, would they feel obligated to do it to other people's children?
Related or not, come on people! Don't be so full of yourselves and in love with your passing thoughts. 
If auntie had bothered to educate herself at all on the reality of home schooling, she would not have the opinion that home schooled children are isolated and friendless. To an adult, her remarks shout "I am an opinionated know-nothing!"
But to a child, remarks like this can plant a seed of insecurity where there was none before.
I am quite sure I would've set auntie straight, at least by pointing out how cruel it is to address children with concerns beyond their understanding or power. Maybe even about how cowardly it is to address a child about a grown-up decision when the grown-up is standing right in front of you. I do not think she would've made it unscathed out of my presence.
I think this is why:
quote:
Most negative remarks are behind my back, I guess.
 
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"Blessed is the man...whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law meditates day and night. He will be like a tree planted by rivers of water..." from Psalm 1
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 1:05:06 PM
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Bagel
Posts: 319
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From: Oregon
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well this same aunt thinks that the babies and children in those Anne Geddes photos are abused because they are made to pose that way.
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Bagel Lisa
check out my blog at http://bagelslifehomeschool.blogspot.com/
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 1:19:47 PM
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dianetavegia
Posts: 2032
Joined: 8/23/2005
From: Southern Baptist, Non Calvinist, Pro Life Ga. girl
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Have you ever had people ask a home schooled child 'Quick! What's 16 X 93?' I had that happen once and quickly butted in and said 'Do you ask all children that or just home schooled children? How much IS 16 X 93?' Well guess what! She didn't KNOW!
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 1:28:44 PM
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Sunnymom
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Joined: 4/11/2005
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I know I have told the story of the carryout at Kroger who has, on more than one occasion, tried to quiz my kids while I'm checking out. The last time I was there, he said that homeschoolers read comic books all day and call it school. I said, "You're right, and Calvin and Hobbes is our favorite." My dh wants to complain to the manager, but the guy is over 30, and over 300 lbs. I don't want to get him fired, because who else would hire him, KWIM?
When people try to quiz the kids, I either tell them that they are being rude and to mind their own business, or I tell them that my kids will answer any questions they have if they will answer mine first. They invariably shut up, which is probably the only smart thing they did all day.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 1:38:25 PM
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his_chosen
Posts: 1103
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We had someone come into this folder a while back disappointed that his home schooled relative didn't know who the first person in space was. Duh, everyone knows it was so-and-so. I read that to ds1, who quickly replied that, no, it wasn't. The first person in space was a Russian who was either injured or died (I don't remember, but ds1 knew), so the Russians didn't make that well known. So mister know-it-all was wrong!
I've had people ask me how I could ever teach my kids math and science. this was in the early years. Today at the track, ds3 wsa questioned about school. The man asked about math. Well, dh is an engineer, so what I can't do, he can.
The best is always when we go on a field trip and our kids take the time to read the signs and then ask questions. Tour guides always know.
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You have a choice. You can throw in the towel or you can use it to wipe the sweat off your face.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 1:42:03 PM
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Bagel
Posts: 319
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Oregon
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quote:
So you're saying she obviously is not easily embarrassed at her own foolish remarks?
apparently not!
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Bagel Lisa
check out my blog at http://bagelslifehomeschool.blogspot.com/
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/22/2008 5:20:17 PM
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joannepir
Posts: 155
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From: NY
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For the negative: My Mom told me that we are going to "ruin" our kids.
For the positive: She also said that they are amazing children and she can't believe how bright they are.
Yep, they're "ruined." 
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But seriously, when you ask the oldest kid if the youngest kid 'ever acts normal' you are being rude. 
THANKS FOR THAT VOTE OF CONFIDENCE!